Teenagers!!!!!

Hi Guys,

I hope you are all well. In this post I'm looking for advice please.

If you don't already know I am mum to the gorgeous Aimee, 12 and guardian of my nephew Billy, 13.

Having one teenagers is hard enough, but two at the same time is torture. All I hear is "but she got to do that" "He got to go there" and all I want to do is scream!!!!

The real thing I struggle with is letting them go a little bit more. How far away from home is safe? what time should I allow them out until at night? How will I know they are safe when I cant see them? the list is endless!!!!

I had Aimee when I had just turned 20, so in many ways I have grown up alongside her, but I also remember clearly what it is like to be her age and that scares me.

Aimee is very different to me when I was her age, I followed the crowd and got into a lot of trouble.

Aimee is head strong, confident and care free. I admire that she doesn't care what anybody thinks of her, (in a good way) she tries new things because she wants to, not because her friends want to. I'm bias but she is amazing.

Billy on the other hand is very different!! he has been in serious trouble at school, always wants to be part of the crowd that don't want him. He's that little boy that we all remember who tried to hard to be part of the it crowd but always lands in trouble as the blame gets put on him. Don't get me wrong I'm not making excuses for him, he makes the choice to be involved in situations or to walk away. He normally makes the wrong choices.

Billy came to live with us when he was 10, he doesn't have great social skills due to his upbringing and try as we might, breaking some of his learned behaviour from his early years is impossible. I wish at times he would listen to us and not push the boundaries. but I guess this is part teenage angst and part to do with our unique situation.

So with 2 very different teenagers to parent I find it hard to create a fair balance between them. I probably allow Aimee to do more and go slightly further because I trust her more to behave, keep in touch and come home when I say. This comes with guilt though as I don't trust Billy at all to do these things due to previous experience.

I'm starting to ramble now, but I am so happy I have managed to get my concerns down in print.

Im hoping by the time Ava is a teen will be an expert!!! Wishful thinking me thinks....

Anyone out there with early teens ANY advice would be appreciated.

Love Leigh Ann